Fear of returning to work

Good afternoon! So, I see that you're familiar with the situation where you can't seem to achieve more or improve your life. It feels like you really want to—and even feel you should—but the process just never gets started. Your dreams remain dreams, shifting every January from one year’s plan list to the same list for the next year. And often, the problem isn’t a lack of talent, time, or opportunities, but rather the psychological “walls” we build ourselves in our own minds. This is called limiting beliefs—thoughts and attitudes that hold us back from growth, self-fulfillment, and, ultimately, success. They can apply to almost any area of life, from romantic relationships to learning a new skill, finding a new job, increasing your income, or starting your own business. These psychological barriers are formed by thoughts like “I can’t,” “I don’t deserve it,” or “the world is the way it is, and nothing can be changed.” They often include sweeping generalizations: “everyone,” “no one,” “never,” “only,” and so on. And phrases like “I can’t,” “it won’t work,” “I doubt myself,” “I’m afraid.” And so on, and so on…

But these beliefs strongly influence your behavior, narrowing your possibilities and keeping you stuck in your comfort zone. The key realization, though, is that these are just your beliefs—not reality—and they can (and should!) be changed.

Anastasia, good day!

Job hunting is also a kind of work, and when a person first starts this process, there can be fears and many worries due to the uncertainty.

Perhaps it will become easier for you once you gain experience communicating in interviews. Often, the first interview is harder than the tenth. At first, you may indeed feel confused if the questions are unfamiliar or unexpected. But after the meeting, you can look up answers or receive them during the interview. And the next time, you’ll already know what to say.

In any case, you are not obligated to meet all the expectations of a potential employer or be perfect. An interview is a meeting between two parties. Not only does the employer evaluate you, but you also decide whether the company, working conditions, and future manager suit you. This perspective often helps you feel more confident.

If job hunting causes you a lot of stress and anxiety, it may be worth consulting a psychologist. Usually, such worries stem not only from the need to go through interviews but also from deeper reasons—fear of mistakes, criticism, rejection, or past experiences where you were often judged or devalued. By working specifically on these causes, you can significantly reduce anxiety and feel more confident not only in interviews but also in other important life situations.

Dear Anastasiia,

After a break, it’s common to feel anxiety about starting again. But to say what to do and how to cope, we need to understand the nature of your stagnation specifically. The psyche is a single organism; most likely, the issue isn’t just about work but also about your self-confidence in general and your attitude toward yourself. This is what needs to be understood and worked on.